On the upside the adults will all go to party and end up waking the next morning not remembering why they have cricks in their neck and all wonder why they’re sore and their wallets are missing.
Read into that what you will.
The best part of the event, of course, is dressing up as an outlandish, cartoonish character with no relation to reality.
So this year I’m going as a voter.
The Tuesday following Halloween is an off-year election and across the country there are a variety of offices – many unknown and some with very few candidates – ready to be filled by fewer and fewer voters.
These off-year elections when there are few or no federal offices up for grabs are among the hardest to get voters to attend.
Sadly, the local elections contain offices which almost always have the most dramatic and immediate impact on people’s lives.
Adding insult to injury, many people will proudly say they don’t vote. These very same people will scream we need a “revolution” to change life in America.
I can only sigh at this nonsense as I’ve preached until I’m blue in the face about the need to get your flatulent fanny off your seat cushion and vote. I also don’t believe those who preach revolution because if they can’t get off their rumps to vote then I doubt they’ll get up off of their spreading backsides to engage in anything akin to revolution.
I also have to sigh because elections are the ultimate bloodless and easiest revolutions in a representative government. If you don’t like them, then vote the morons out.
The average non-voter then is the epitome of the Halloween child who complains about trick or treating, but never actually does it.
Short of wearing themselves out as romance would have it – defending the Republic by voting or running for office, they run around in costumes complaining about the quality of candy though they never, ever knocked on a door to get any.
One of the most interesting local elections is occurring in Rockville – a city well known for its lack of transparency, a city manager indifferent to city staff, and some elected officials who flirt with mediocrity so often they have been referred to with derision by county and state officials with a snickering often reserved for the loud-mouthed buffoon at a party with food sticking out of their teeth.
This is a curious state of affairs as there are plenty of county and state representatives snickering who populate their social media sites with dribble most cogent pre-pubescent pustules snear at with derision for very good reason: No one cares what you ate for breakfast.
Rockville also has other problems. It is populated by do-gooding activists, some of whom are as wrong-headed as those they oppose.
A small, insular group of voters keep perpetuating the cycle of mediocrity in Rockville because very few people vote. “One vote counts as four here,” a city activist recently said during early voting at City Hall.
He is effectively correct. All attempts to move the voting to a Presidential year failed because some feared that additional voters wouldn’t be “informed” voters.
The problem is numbers – not informed voters.
There is little evidence that those who routinely vote in these local elections are well informed. Some office holders candidly say they got votes from people who told the office holder they liked the way they looked or how they spoke.
Hardly the paradigm of virtuous voter we might expect.
The idea of getting only “informed” voters to the polls is also an insidious term which breaks down to a complete lack of understanding or a mindful disregard for the democratic process.
The struggle is in numbers. Get more out to vote – candidates and the media are responsible for providing the necessary information.
If you want to argue you don’t want better numbers at the polls until they are informed then you are as guilty as those who support a poll tax or literacy test before allowing people to vote. As Val Kilmer intimated in “Tombstone” your hypocrisy knows no bounds.
I thought of dressing up as Doc Holliday for Halloween by the way, but figured someone might take my toy six shooter as the real thing and I don’t want to end up without my milk duds on a slab in the morgue.
I’m wearing a bowtie and a smile.
And I vote. Trick or Treat!